In the humble opinion of your intrepid host, episode 17 of the 43rd season of Saturday Night Live won’t go down as one of the all-time greats. However, one particular segment of that episode definitely deserves to be put in the conversation as an all-time great; at least for black people. It ranks up there with Eddie Murphy’s Kill the White People bit and any of Keenan Thompson’s Steve Harvey skits. The skit in question? None other than Black Jeopardy, featuring the Wakandan King himself, T’Challa (Chadwick Boseman). Behold, this televised masterpiece:

This skit speaks to my life so much, it’s downright criminal:

  1. Low key, the beat on the Jeopardy remix is hot. It’s something straight out of Timbaland’s collection.
  2. Darnell Hayes needs to be a real person and needs to be hosting his own show.
  3. Installment plans are quite literally the blackest thing I know of.
  4. As usual, the categories were perfect. I swear I’ve said or heard each of these phrases this week alone.
  5. Since I’ve gone bald, I don’t go to a barber as much. But when I do, the first chair is ALWAYS the one you avoid. So including it as an answer in the “Aw hell naw!” category is perfect. At the last shop I went to, I’d silently say a prayer for the victims I passed in that dreaded first chair. Their look of fear still haunts my dreams. I mean seriously, the only time I’d go to the dude in the first chair is if they were shaving my hair to prep me for the electric chair. Even then, I’d probably squirm a bit. And not because of the whole “I’m about to die” thing.
  6. Everything – from teenage pregnancy, to school shootings, to bland-ass pizza at lunch – is blamed on taking prayer out of schools.
  7. I swear one day I’m going to open a new line of credit in somebody else’s name. To, you know, honor them.
  8. My student loans are paid off, praise Jehovah. But there are plenty of other “I ain’t got it” moments left inside me just waiting to come out. But I have to admit: I never thought to play dead to avoid paying bills. That’s genius.
  9. Airline baggage fees are for suckas. I might not be brave enough to carry an oversized bag on-board with Shanice. But I’ll definitely stuff the hell out of my 30-lbs carry on.
  10. While it is an excellent idea to send smart-ass kids to a prestigious university where they can discover their untapped potential, um, yeah. It’s better to just put them out of our damn houses. Good try, T’Challa. But I can only give you partial credit for your answer.
  11. While I’m vehemently opposed to the “No Snitching” campaign, I’m not stupid. Black folks have been killed by police for selling loose cigarettes, carrying legally concealed weapons, or for being in their own backyard at night. Don’t be shocked if the next black dude making headlines was killed by police for snitching to those said police.
  12. The prizes were perfect. I literally just ate lunch that I stored in a recycled butter container, I won’t touch a steak unless it’s well done, and Sprite can thank Drake, Weezy, Kanye, Eminem and LeBron for becoming the official black drink, overtaking grape drink, red Kool-Aid, and sweet tea.
  13. I have a fair share of Karen’s in my life. At the risk of pulling the “Some of my best friends are (fill in the race)”, I really do love my Karen’s. And my Molly’s. And my Cody’s. And my Connor’s. Some of them do have cullinary skills. I mean, if I’m in the mood for some kind of unique casserole, a gourmet salad, or another dish indigenous to Caucasia, Karen is most definitely my go-to. But everybody, including T’Challa knows that soul food of any variety is off limits. Soul food is not to be subjected to remixes, alternative versions, or experimentation. Even with the best of intentions, Karen dabbling with potato salad, dressing (not stuffing), greens, and mac-n-cheese does a true disservice to our fore parents currently residing in the ancestral plane. Put the raisins down, Karen.

While I think the Black Jeopardy episode with Tom Hanks as a Trump supporter was funnier (and was a surprisingly accurate take on the similarities between black folks and rural white conservatives), it’s hard to argue against the greatness of last week’s Black Jeopardy skit. I found myself doing a head nod of approval far more with this latest version. Maybe the Black Panther effect strikes again.

Wakanda, forever!

-ACL

 

Advertisements